I love the food, the music, the slightly chaotic kitchen, opening a good bottle of wine and realising three hours have disappeared because everyone is still sitting around the table. But I don’t love the idea that entertaining has to be an event. Having people over doesn’t have to be complicated or impressive. It just has to be real.
Whether you are twenty-something in your first flat, juggling toddlers, suddenly living in an empty nest or trying to get the whole family together again, the best entertaining is usually the simplest. Put some food on the table, open a bottle and get people together.
For the graduate in a first flat, that might mean four friends squeezed around a tiny table, supermarket food across the bench and a bottle of Pinot Gris being passed around. The furniture is mismatched, someone is still paying off a student loan, and nobody minds. One person brings bread and cheese, another dessert. It doesn’t need to be expensive, and it certainly doesn’t need to be perfect.
For young families, entertaining looks different. Toddlers are running around, bedtime is looming and nobody has quite finished a sentence. But adult friendships matter. One person brings the fish, another a salad, someone else something sweet. The children eat early, and eventually the adults can sit down, pour a glass of Chardonnay and finish a conversation.
Then there is the pleasure of having more time again: long lunches, spontaneous dinners and friends who don’t have to leave by half past seven. And the grandparents who know that getting everyone together is worth the effort. The table grows, the stories get repeated and the conversation gets louder. These are the gatherings people remember.
Sometimes the best thing is to do exactly the opposite of cooking: book a table and let someone else look after you. I love the neighbourhood restaurant where someone remembers your name, the little wine bar with an interesting list, and the places you return to because you always stay longer than planned. Restaurants give us somewhere to celebrate, reconnect and discover wines we might not otherwise try. Supporting them matters.
At home or out, wine should belong with the food and the company, not dominate the occasion. A fresh Pinot Gris with seafood, Chardonnay with roast chicken, Pinot Noir at a long lunch: choose something you enjoy and let the evening take its course. You don’t need six different wines or the perfect occasion. Make it easy enough that you will actually do it. The point isn’t where we gather. It’s that we do.
And when the occasion calls for it, open your own front door and bring everyone home.